Mr. Johnson, Your Lamp is On Line 2

The city of West Hollywood has installed new parking meters that will call your cellphone when your time is almost up. And for those who don't tire, as it were, of receiving calls from inanimate objects, Italian tire manufacturer Pirelli has introduced a line of tires that will send your mobile phone a message when your tire pressure is low. I can see the day coming when most of a person's possessions will be able to call them--enabling people to carry on entire conversations with inanimate objects. I can even imagine a Bob Newhart routine of the future (conducted on a cellphone, natch):

BOB: He-hello? You say my tires are low? How low? (whistles) That low, huh? Oh, hang on; my call waiting is beeping...He-hello? Oh, hi, microwave oven. No, I'm talking to my tires on the other line. The toaster? What's it doing? Well, tell it to mind its own business. There's no one home; it shouldn't even be toasting anything...Am I going to have to separate you two?! OK, that's it. Get the dishwasher on the line....Oops, there's call waiting again....I have to go, the couch is calling...

It may even be necessary for administrative assistants to develop new skill sets to be able to screen a person from his own furniture.

ASSISTANT: Sir, your lamp is on line 2. Are you in?
BOSS: No, Miss Jenkins, take a message, but please get my bathroom sink on the line.