Tuesday, March 29, 2011

The Unfriendly Skies

It seems appropriate that I am posting this while sitting in the Albany airport. As some of you may recall, back in November 2008 I won the District 53 Toastmasters Humorous Speech Contest with what has become known as "the airplane speech." The contest was apparently videotaped, but three years' worth of effort has not been able to procure a copy.

Last January, though, the District held a special "Jan Jam" event whereby past Humorous Speech Contest winners were invited to reprise their speeches and participate in a panel discussion. This time, I came armed with my own video camera and captured it, for reasons passing understanding.

There was no camera operator, so it's all in long shot, which means the prop "reveal" may not be all that effective. I also screwed up one line.

Anyway, I give you this throwback to the days when I was afraid of flying--a much happier, more convenient time...

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Let the Madness Begin

Get yer brackets out. Watching ESPN's Selection Sunday while listening to Separation Sunday. I'm guessing Syracuse will be a 3 seed, but I am always wrong. At least SU isn't going into the NCAA finals with a multitude of casualties.

Tuesday, March 08, 2011

The Unfriendly Skies

Yes, I am utterly appalled by this horrific story:

Virgin Blue Flight Attendant Puts 17-Month Old In the Overhead Storage Bin


I mean, come on, that's outrageous. Everyone who flies knows that children should go with the checked luggage.

Alas Vegas

Greetings from Las Vegas, my least favorite place on Earth (it's basically DisneyWorld for people having mid-life crises or pining for the days of adolescence, for reasons passing understanding). I am staying at the Wynn Resort, not, I later found out, named for Ed Wynn, or even Keenan Wynn. One doesn't realize how much one appreciates anti-smoking legislation until coming here. What happens in Vegas stays in my lungs.

The other morning, there was one of those quintessential "Only in Vegas" stories.... I was walking down the hotel corridor and one of the rooms had a Charlie Sheen People magazine cover taped to the door, accompanied by a handwritten note, presumably to the chambermaid, saying "Stop taking down our Charlie Sheen pictures." The chambermaid was behind me and she knocked, then entered the room. I heard her then gasp "Oh, my God!" I did not want to know and kept going. Te CSI people didn't show up, so I assumed it was nothing horrible....

The one good thing about Vegas, though, is that the hotel exercise room is generally empty at 6 am...